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The most interesting thing that I have observed about emotionally unavailable men is that they desperately want to be emotionally intimate and feel a connection, but fear and imbibed coping strategies prevent them from doing the same.

If you are the philosophical kind, let me put it this way: they castoff what they seek.

Closing that door may be due to a lack of confidence, fear of intimacy, or perfectionism, just to name a few explanations.

Finding the key to opening that door is the real challenge.

You meet lots of people who are married to their routine rather than to another person.

A typical reaction is when they hate changing their schedules and they show themselves to be very inflexible.

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And it certainly, doesn’t mean that he’s not up for sex! Pay attention When it comes to men who are emotionally unavailable, ignore the positives but always believe the negatives!There is nothing more lonely than loving an emotionally unavailable partner.The emotionally detached man will court you, fall in love with you and even marry you—but when he gains your love and commitment, he withdraws his communication and affection. In the beginning the emotionally detached man may work hard to win your love, affection and commitment."But if you can tell they are resisting changing emotional states, or they don’t have a lot of range, then there’s something threatening to them about emotions."Although emotional unavailability is often depicted as someone whose life is falling apart (hello, ), it is ultimately about control."It's sort of a protection or defense from feeling hurt," says Megan Fleming, Ph. Emotionally unavailable folks are fiercely independent: They may not feel like they need anyone.And then, of course, there's the dreaded cliché of being "emotionally unavailable" and unable to commit.